Debbbie Downer

I always want to post more often. And I usually have great post ideas when I'm driving at work. And by the time I get home or the weekend rolls around when I can get to a computer to write, my mind goes blank. All I can think of is how rough my week was at work. And I don't want this to become a dumping ground of complaints. Also trying to complain less. Started realizing my response to "how is/was your day" was nearly always something negative or bland. I feel like I remake a commitment to "not complain so much" about every 6 months. Never seems to really stick. I think there is something to being naturally pessimistic. I want to be more pleasant and happier. I just can't see to will it to be. It's not as easy as "choose to look at the positives." I can look at the positives & wonder why they don't make me happy. 

All that said because my instinct was to tell you that this week was hard. My birthday was Monday and for the most part went unnoticed. No birthday cards in the mail. No "happy birthday" from colleagues or roommates. One of my roommate's birthday was Thursday and he was told "happy birthday" by my other roommate & landlord. He even got some vodka from a coworker. I was jealous. Another friend posted how much love she received for her birthday. I became more jealous. Combine that with a hard week at work and I was ready for the weekend. Ready to hide away in my room and watch tv. Watch the UGA game. 

Sorry for a downer post. I knew moving across the country where I knew no one would be hard. But it is harder than I expected. I'm fairly independent and more introverted than most realize. (I'm more of an extroverted introvert.) Making friends is hard. Work relationships are strained. (Don't have co-workers in the normal sense) It is alienating. It is lonely. 

In an attempt to end on a positive note, the weather last week was pretty great. Would be about 57 when I woke up and around 60 when I would be leaving for work. Actually wore a light jacket when I left for work most days last week. And would get up to around 80ish. And would drop fairly quickly as the sun started to go down. Slept with the windows open.